Once Again
I went to post, popped into Jolene's blog first, and found that she'd stolen the words right out of my heart--again. Seriously, dearie, you've got to stop doing this or I'm going to begin to freak, thinking that I'm posting things under anothers name when I'm unconscious.
Truth is, I'm just...tired. I get a substantial amount of sleep--usually--but it's more than just physical tiredness. I'm tired spiritually and mentally. You could almost say I'm tired of being tired. I'm tired of trying, tired of not trying, tired of crying, and tired of staring out of the windows of the emotionless absence. And tired of waiting. So tired of waiting.
Tired of watching other people's lives unfold with so many promises, with so much to look forward to, with certainty and purpose. I'm tired of watching everyone else smile while the tears run down my face. I'm tired of standing here in this grey corner while the world passes me by. I'm tired of hearing people talking about all the great opportunities they've had, all the wonderful things that have happened to them. I try to be happy for people, especially people I love, but it's just so hard. Sometimes I just want to crawl into a hole and cry.
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